The Best Things Happen When You're Elsewhere

Tune: Irving Berlin's "The Best Things Happen While You Dance"

The best things
Happen when you're elsewhere,
Happen when you're taking a nap
Or taking a nip
Or two;

While, elsewhere
(Yes, and you may well swear),
Lady Luck is handing the prize
To ten other guys
Like you.

Someday, you will find the pluck,
Get in the ring, and—forget to duck;
That's when you will wish your luck
Were elsewhere:

Proving that the best things
Happen somewhere else.