It's Only a Shindy in Afghanistan

Tune: Joe Young's, Jack Little's and John Siras's "In a Shanty in Old Shanty Town"

Version I (Waltz)

It's only a shindy in Afghanistan:
Who's Pashtu, who's Hindi, and what's "Taliban"?
And, before we eat crow, it behooves us to know—
Is the Northern Alliance a friend or a foe?

The search for Osama is somewhat in doubt.
The heck with Osama—let's search for an out.
How the Mounties will jeer, if we don't get our man
With a shindy in Afghanistan.

Version II (Two-Step)

It's only a shindy in Afghanistan:
Al Qaeda is windy, it quakes like a flan.
(While That Man in Iraq is by no means laid back,
For he knows, once it's over, he's under attack.)

They'll fight for Osama; they won't give an inch.
They're fond of Osama, except in a pinch—
And a pinch we can give them, if anyone can,
In a shindy in Afghanistan.