The Night We Ingested Shampoo

Tune: Frederick Loewe's "The Night They Invented Champagne"

The night we ingested shampoo,
I felt a little twinge
And then began to cringe.

The night we ingested shampoo–
With intermittent chills,
And green about the gills,

I now had but one thing to do;
So, as I writhed, I cried, "You swine!!
I'll thank you not to toast
Maurice Chevalier's ghost
In anything that's stronger than a
Dry
White
Wine."